Monkey Bread, With Whole Wheat Flour & Love

It drives me insane when a writer uses an exclamation point in place of a question mark. Everyone should know a sentence no longer makes any sense if it's supposed to have question mark but it instead is finished off with an exclamation point.

It is unnecessary to yell. You're asking a question.

It gets under my skin. I am the wife who went to college for words, the husband told everyone on Facebook after he beat me at Words With Friends for the third time. So, there you have it: The misuse of the exclamation point drives me batty.

It is true I sometimes write in incomplete sentences, though I scold everyone at work for doing it. And I sometimes struggle with when to use a semicolon. (My solution? Avoid the semicolon. Write around it. Do whatever you have to do to get out of using one.)

It also makes me a bit crazy when I've had a regular ol' breakfast, a salad for lunch and (hot!) leftovers for dinner, and I'm left with not a whole lot to blog about. I guess that leaves me no choice but to rewind to Christmas Eve when the husband talked me into making him monkey bread for breakfast.

Thanksgiving Trial Run: No-Knead Rolls

Last weekend I did something I never thought I'd do: I bought skinny jeans. I've been hating them from afar for months now, secretly wanting to kick the person who thought it'd be cool to bring tapered-leg jeans back in style. When none of your pants fit, though, you can be swayed to make very impulsive purchases.

I had store credit. The jeans fit. I bought them. I wore them to work. And then I debated all day whether I felt hip in my skinny jeans or like it was 1992 all over again.

Although I was willing to wear snug-fitting jeans in public, I wasn't quite ready to do so in ballet flats and my tapered ankles for all the world to see. The wedding boots had to do. The truth is, there's a chance I subconsciously wanted skinny jeans because I found a new pair of boots I'd really like Santa to leave under my tree. In fact, I think these jeans would look perfect with those boots.

Yes, sometimes I like to torture myself. And that's exactly why I made these rolls. They're going to be perfect on our Thanksgiving buffet - perfectly torturous for those who shouldn't be consuming carbohydrates.

Water Bagels Make the Husband Happy

I reward the husband with food. It's a bad habit, I know, and probably one I should break before we open this house up to any little people, but it works. Food treats make the husband happy, and they make me happy. And, for that, I doubt I'll be able to stop anytime soon.

The husband has been super spectacular lately. I, obviously, always think he's the bee's knees, but he has really stepped up lately. I think he's vying for the Husband of the Year Award. Or maybe he's hoping Santa's watching. Either way, his good behavior has earned him multiple food rewards in the last week.

Not-Yo-Momma's Apple Bread (Or Is It?)

Husband, via text, Friday at 4 pm: Want to make a coffee cake tonight for me to bring to work?
Wife: U know it
Husband: Yup. Best wife ever

I tell you that not so you can puke on your keyboard at our newlywedness. I tell you that so you know why I had to bake after work yesterday. You heard him. The husband really twisted my arm.

All the way home I debated as to whether I should make the boys at the quarry another coffee cake or if I should switch things up a little and make a cinnamon Bundt cake. Decisions, decisions.

Then I walked in the door and saw the husband had brought home a bag full of apples.

"Can you make apple bread?" He asked a bit tentatively. 

I just looked at him.

Gimme Some of that Banana Bread, Honey

It was 95 degrees here today - an unseasonably warm, muggy, sunny, run-from-the-car-to-the-air-conditioned-house day for us. But I've had overripe bananas sitting on my kitchen counter just calling my name for days. So despite the humidity, and the fact that I thought the husband was really going to fight me on heating up the kitchen, I had to bake tonight. Yes, I had to bake tonight.

For those of you who didn't go to high school with me, I'm the Banana Bread Queen. For years, I enjoyed whipping up baked goods for my friends' birthdays, and banana bread was an easy and delicious choice. But the truth is I haven't really been making a lot of banana breads in recent years. (I know, I made one back in November, but I really don't make them that often anymore.) 

Basically, I always want to eat the whole loaf. 

Garlic Knots Good Enough for Company

Garlic Knots

Me: "And we'll take an order of garlic knots."
Pizza guy: "Garlic nuts? Nuts?! No, we don't have those."
Me, to the then-boyfriend: "Apparently, we aren't gonna get garlic knots down here."

That was me about two years ago. Da and the stepmother had driven the 700+ miles for their first visit to our tiny rented house. The husband and I (just a boyfriend and a girlfriend, back then) had only been living south of the Mason-DIxon for a couple of months at that point and were still settling in. 

The then-boyfriend: "He's never heard of garlic knots?!" 

You can only imagine the husband's disappointment when he realized his beloved knots weren't going to be so easy to come by in our new state. We were so used to ordering pies and garlic knots it never occurred to us that this may not be the norm everywhere. But he has adjusted - we've adjusted. A couple of years, another dog and a new house later, his parents are now visiting. And we no longer need to argue over who has to call the pizza place and ask - with crossed fingers - whether they make garlic knots. 

Garlic Knots
Dough recipe from Eating Well


1 lb whole wheat pizza dough:

1 cup whole-wheat flour
1 cup all-purpose flour
1 package yeast
1 teaspoon salt
1/2 teaspoon sugar
3/4 cup hot water, (120-130°F)
1 tablespoon extra virgin olive oil

garlicky herb butter:

4 tablespoons salted butter

2 garlic cloves, minced

a dash of salt

1/2 tablespoon Italian seasoning

1 tablespoon Parmesan cheese, grated

Prepare the pizza dough and allow it to rise on the counter for about 30 minutes. Pinch of pieces of dough and roll into small snakes. Tie the dough into knots and place on a lightly greased baking sheet. (A quick spray will do.)

Preheat the oven to 400 degrees F while the knots are rising.

In a small saucepan, melt the butter and garlic until fragrant. Turn the burner off and allow the butter to remain warm.

Sprinkle the knots with a dash of salt and bake for about 20 minutes or until lightly brown. (Be careful not to let the knots bake too long and harden.)

Baking Garlic Knots

Put the baked knots in a bowl and cover with the warm garlicky butter. Sprinkle the herbs and cheese on top; serve warm.


Makes 24 knots

Hard Rolls for the Husband

I gave the husband his chili options yesterday, to which he said: "Why do you always do this? How about you just use the recipe you've been using?" Well, the truth is, I haven't been using a recipe. I throw different stuff in that pot every single time. So I humored him and skipped the recipes I wanted to try and stuck to my usual I'll-put-whatever-I-think-sounds-good-in-this-pot routine. And to top it off, after choosing chili for dinner, the husband said he thought he'd rather wait until today to eat it. I was back to square one.

Since I was planning to make chili, we had ground turkey and ground beef thawed in the fridge. I decided to use half of it for the chili and half of it for meatballs. I had never made meatballs with ground turkey before, though, so I was a bit skeptical. (Turns out, they were great! But the husband thinks ground turkey has a slightly strange taste, so I think we'll always have to use half turkey and half beef.)

But I'm getting ahead of myself. What to go with our homemade meatballs and Marinara? I knew if the husband found the turkey meatballs only mediocre, homemade rolls would make up for it. I threw on my vintage apron (thank you C & A!), and grabbed my classic cookbook.

There's something about that cookbook that makes me feel like I'm channeling my great-grandmother. So instead of lending the recipe to my own interpretation, I followed it exactly and pretended it was 1950. And I'm pretty sure the husband was happy I didn't put my own spin on these rolls - they were amazing! I've never made rolls so soft and chewy on the inside and crusty and hard on the outside. Best. Rolls. Ever. Apparently, sometimes a tested recipe really is a good idea, ha.

Hard Rolls

Hard Rolls

From Better Homes and Gardens

1 package yeast

1 cup water

1 tablespoon sugar

2 tablespoons butter, melted

1 teaspoon salt

3 cups sifted flour (up to 4, if needed)

2 stuff-beaten egg whites

Soften yeast in 1/4 cup water, warmed to 110 degrees F. 

To remaining water, add sugar, butter and salt. Add 1 cup flour; beat well. Add yeast mixture, egg whites; mix. Add remaining flour to make a soft dough. Knead till smooth and satiny. 

Place in greased bowl, turning to cover; let rise till double.

Punch down and let double again. Divide for rolls; cover and let rest for 10 minutes. Shape.

Place 2 1/2 inches apart on baking sheet. Cover; let double. Brush with egg yolk diluted with water. (I brushed mine with a  little egg white.)

Bake in preheated 450-degree oven for 18-20 minutes. Place a large flat pan of boiling water on floor of oven to give crustiness. Makes 24 rolls.

(Truth be told, I only made 12 rolls, but that's because I was using my rolls for meatball sandwiches. I'm sure these would make 24 perfectly sized dinner rolls, though.) 

BHG French Bread

After packing the husband a sandwich made on last night's French bread and receiving a text at about noon that read "This sandwich is awesome," I knew I should post last night's bread recipe. It wasn't anything that special, but it was easy and it was good. The hardest part was being patient and actually let it rise as much as the recipe stated. (I'm known for relying on rapid-rise yeast and only letting bread dough rise for about half the time I'm supposed to. What can I say? I'm an Aries.)


French Bread
From Better Homes and Gardens

5-1/2 to 6 cups all-purpose flour
2 packages active dry yeast
1-1/2 teaspoons salt
2 cups warm water (120 degrees F to 130 degrees F)
cooking spray
cornmeal, about a tablespoon
1 tablespoon liquid egg whites
1 tablespoon water

In a KitchenAid mixer, stir together 2 cups of the flour, the yeast and salt. Heat the water, and add it to tthe flour mixture. Mix on low to medium speed for 30 seconds, then beat on high for 3 minutes. Using a wooden spoon, stir in as much of the remaining flour as you can. (I think I was only able to add in about 2 more cups.)

Turn dough out onto a lightly floured surface. Knead in enough remaining flour to make a stiff dough that is smooth and elastic. Shape dough into a ball. Place in a lightly greased bowl, turning once to grease surface. Cover; let rise in a warm place until double in size. (I covered mine with a kitchen towel and let it rise for about an hour on top of the fridge.)

Punch dough down. Turn dough out onto a lightly floured surface. Divide dough in half. Cover; let rest for 10 minutes. Meanwhile, lightly grease a baking sheet with cooking spray. Sprinkle with cornmeal.

Roll each portion of the dough into a 15x10-inch rectangle. Roll up, starting from a long side; seal well. Pinch ends and pull slightly to taper. Place seam side down on the prepared baking sheet. In a small bowl stir together the liquid egg white and water. Brush some of the egg white mixture over the loaves. Cover the loaves - again! - and let them rise until nearly double in size. (The recipe said to let them rise for 35 to 45 minutes, but I know I didn't let mine rise this long. Let 'em sit for a while, and if they look like they're getting a bit larger, you're good.)

Preheat the oven to 375 degrees F. Using a sharp knife, make 3 or 4 diagonal cuts about 1/4 inch deep across the top of each loaf. 

Bake for 20 minutes. Brush again with some of the egg white mixture. Continue baking for 15 to 20 minutes more - or until bread sounds hollow when lightly tapped. Cool the loaves on wire racks. 

Servings Per Recipe 2 loaves (28 slices)
Calories 85, Sodium 128 mg, Carbohydrate 18g, Fiber 1g, Protein 3g

Hearty Whole Wheat Beer Bread

Hearty Whole Wheat Beer Bread

Hearty Whole Wheat Beer Bread

2 1/2 cups flour (sifted)
1/2 cup whole wheat flour (sifted)
3 teaspoons baking powder (omit if using self-rising flour)
1 teaspoon salt (omit if using self-rising flour)
1/4 cup sugar
1 (12 ounce) bottle dark beer (I used a bottle of porter, but you can use any beer you prefer.)
2 tablespoons butter (melted)

Sift the flours, baking powder and salt in a large bowl; add the sugar.

Stir the ale into the dry mixture. This will look a bit wet, but don't worry: Everything will be OK. While mixing the beer and dry mixture together, melt the butter.

Pour the dough into a bread pan, and pour the butter over the dough. (I thought this looked pretty awful, but it ended up alright in the end. The result was a very nice crusty bread. The original recipe said if you'd prefer a bread with a softer crust to add the butter directly to the dough mixture. It's your call.) 

Bake at 375 degrees F for one hour or until the bread sounds hollow when tapped.

Servings Per Loaf: 8

Amount Per Serving: Calories 236.4, Total Fat 3.4 g, Total Carbohydrate 43.4 g, Dietary Fiber 1.9 g7, Sugars 6.3 g, Protein 5.2 g

Lightened Up Banana Bread

After years of making my great-grandmother's banana bread, I decided to put my own spin on the recipe. What the husband doesn't know just makes him healthier.

Lightened Up Banana Bread

2 bananas, mashed
3/4 cup sugar
1 cup all-purpose flour
1/2 cup whole wheat flour
1 teaspoon baking soda
1 teaspoon salt
2 tablespoons oil
1 tablespoon unsweetened applesauce

Preheat the oven to 350 degrees F.

Mash the bananas and sugar until combined.

Sift and add the flours, soda and salt.

Stir in the oil and applesauce, and bake for 45 minutes or until a toothpick comes out clean.

Servings Per Recipe: 8
Amount Per Serving: Calories 211.9, Total Fat 3.7 g, 5, Trans Fat 0.0 g, 0%Cholesterol 0.0 mg, Sodium 449.0 mg, Potassium 154.5 mg, Total Carbohydrate 43.0 g, Dietary Fiber 2.1 g, Sugars 22.4 g, Protein 2.9 g